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| Helping Children To Understand Death |
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Children are special people who have special
needs when a death strikes a family. They need to be reassured
that even though part of their life is now different, most
things will stay the same.
Too often children are left alone in their
grief with the belief that they are too young too comprehend
loss.
As adults, we may be so pre-occupied with
our own sorrow, that we may overlook their feelings. Children
need to grieve. We need to provide them with the support
and understanding in helping them work through their feelings.
To support our children, we can:
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Give The Children Permission
To Grieve. Let them know that it is okay to
feel sad. Don’t' try to hide your tears. Stay
close to your children. Reassure them with a hug.
Let them know they are not alone in their sadness. |
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Be Honest With Children.
Don't tell children something they will need to
unlearnlater. Talk to them at their level of understanding.
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Take Time To Listen. Let
children talk about their concerns, fears, memories
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Notify Child's School Or Daycare
About A Death. Staff should be aware of a
crisis in a student's life so they can offer extra
support and understanding. |
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Allow Children To Participate
In The Rituals If They Wish. Giving them the
choice of being involved reassures that they are
valued family members. If they are reluctant to
attend, do not force them or make them feel guilty.
If they decide to attend visitation and/or funeral
, prepare them in advance for what they might
expect to see or happen. Be sensitive to the age
and level of understanding of each child. |
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We cannot totally shield our children from
an awareness of death.If they are old enough to care, they
are old enough to feel the sadness of a death whether a
pet, friend, parent or family member.
If children learn to face sadness knowing
they have the support of family, they will be better prepared
to cope as they grow older.
There are many books and audio/visual
aids available to help the child understand the death of
someone special:
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| The
Fall of Freddie the Leaf |
By:
Leo Buscaglia
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| Lifetimes |
By:
Bryan Mellonie / Robert Ingpen |
| Talking
About Death: A Dialogue Between Parent & Child |
By:
Earl Grollman |
| Learning
to Say Goodbye
When A Parent Dies |
By:
Eda LeShan |
| Always
Gramma |
By:
V. M. Nelson |
| How
Smudge Came |
By:
Nan
Gregory |
| Looking
for Diamonds |
By:
Brenda Seabrooke |
| My
Grandson Lew |
By:
Charlotte Zolotow |
| Mick
Harte Was Here |
By:
Barbara Park |
| Grandad's
Prayers of the Earth
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By:
Douglas Wood |
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